Birthday...

So this is the month of Birthday's in my family. My mom turned 54 on May 21. My son, Gavin or monkey as I lovingly call him turned 2 on May 23. And today is my 25th birthday. So in a matter of 9 days we have 3 birthdays. Talk about busy. Plus there is Mother's Day and Memorial Day thrown in...That makes one hell of an expensive month!!! Today I worked and got a cake and ballons at work. Came home and Mike bought me 2 90 minute massages at Massage Envy. I've been asking for those since Christmas, so I'm glad I finally got them! Tomorrow I get to go to defensive driving school for my stupid photo radar ticket that I shouldn't have to do cause it wasn't me that set off the damn thing. So from 7:30-1, I will be there than at 3:30 mokey is haveing his birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese. Finally we get to go out like grown ups when my mom gets here. So tomorrow night is P-A-R-T-Y night!!! We're going to the Bay and like always I will have pics to share!

~S

How to drive in Phoenix

Ah. . . . . the truth at last!!!!!

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name. It is 'FEE-NICKS'.

2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00pm . Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.

3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 85 mph. On Loop 101, your speed is expected to match the highway number. Anything less is considered 'wussy'.

4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Phoenix has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second However, East Valley , SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.

5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot

6. Never honk at anyone...ever! Seriously! It's another offense that can get you shot.

7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Phoenix. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting.

8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, barrels, cones, cows, horses, cats, mattresses, shredded tires, squirrels, rabbits, crows, vultures, javelinas, roadrunners, and the coyotes feeding on any of these items.

9. Maricopa Freeway, Papago Freeway and the 'I-10' are the same road. SR-202 is the same road as The Red Mountain FWY. Dunlap and Olive are the same street, too. Jefferson becomes Washington , but they are not the same street. I-17 is also called The Black Canyon Freeway, as well as, The Veterans Memorial Highway, and if all that isn't enough to remember, SR-51 has recently been renamed Piestewa Freeway because Squaw Peak Parkway was too easy pronounce. SR-101 is also the Pima FWY, except west of I-17, which is also The Black Canyon FWY, and The Veterans Memorial HWY, west of I-17, it is known as the Agua Fria FWY. Lastly, Thunderbird Rd. becomes Cactus Rd., but Cactus Rd. does not become Thunderbird Rd. because it dead-ends at a mountain.

10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally activated.'

11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65 mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off' accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.

12. For summer driving, it is advisable to wear potholders on your hands.

Massage & BJ?!?!

My BFF in Hawaii sent me this the other day. She took the picture as she was walking to work and thought I would get a good laugh from it since I am a LMT.

What I wish I wore today

I haven't done this in a while. Things have been insane around the house the past week or so. Sorry to have neglected...
With moving departments comes learning new procedures...One of the people who did not fare so well in my old department was sent to my new department to try and avoid giving him a box to pack his desk with, and I don't think it is helping much. This guy is about the slowest person I've had to work with in a while. We were going over procedures today and literally 2 minutes after he did it he couldn't remember what he had just done to do it again. I know it can be hard when your learning but come on now, you just did the effin thing and now your lost?!?!